Freeze Frame

I am having a day. A guess a series of days. I wish I could go back in time to when Bridget could sit but not crawl and freeze it there. I am getting so frustrated yanking this baby away from things and situations that might kill her.

I know she’s an infant. I know she doesn’t understand. But it’s really frustrating to not be able to do a single thing unless she is safely contained in her play pen or her exersaucer (which she is tolerating again and I’m going to take it because it means she’s safe and happy for a few minutes while she’s in it). I feel like I am not giving her enough time to be on the floor doing her thing because invariably if I let her down, she heads straight for the one thing in an otherwise perfectly baby-proofed room that will kill her. I can’t remove all electronic devices. I can’t make her understand that the tablecloth on the side table in her room will not hold her up no matter how many times she tries. I feel like we are always just a nanosecond away from a major head trauma or electrical shock.

Hell, I am even wary of leaving her in her crib because she has taken to gnawing on it. She has actually uncovered wood beneath the paint. I often go in there to her and find little specks of black paint on her face. I really hope that fucker wasn’t painted with lead paint.

So between trying to keep her from a fatal injury and trying to figure out if she’s eating enough and the right things, I am not having a very good mom week.

Filed under Mommy Zombie |