Slow News Day

Wow, the internet sure is quiet today. I’ve been working literally all day, which is something I haven’t done in over a year. Unless you count, you know, caring for and rearing a child as “work” but that’s just crazy talk. Anyway, I was hoping for fun and titillating blog posts from all of you slackers, which doesn’t appear to be happening. I’m not angry. I’m just very disappointed in you all. Very disappointed.

Anyway, since you all seem to be having as dull a day as I am, I thought I’d share this completely whacked out dream I had the other night.  Any ametuer dream interpreters out there, do your worst!

So in the dream, I was in a hotel of some sort. And for some unknown reason I decided that the best course of action for me was to go to the bathtub and cut off my left leg.  So I did. And then I went about my business. Got dressed, walked around, talked to people.  Please don’t ask me how I got around on one leg mere moments after a self-amputation. And I kept wondering why no one could tell I had only one leg all of a sudden. Then I looked down and realized that my pants made it look like I still had both legs. Oh. Well of course. Duh.

Then I figured it was high time I go back and clean up the mess I had made, what with cutting off a limb in a hotel bathtub. I’m nothing if not considerate. So I went back and started rinsing out the tub, which strangely was absent of my recently separated leg, and found in the bottom of the tub after all the mess had drained away, Bridget’s bathtub book.

I woke up with much the same feeling you are probably having right now. What the fuck? And didn’t take val.ium or drink vodka before bed that night. I don’t think.

Filed under Whacked Subconscious |