Off to the Beach

We are off tomorrow to Cancun. I’ll be writing my blog entries on paper and will post when I get home.

Wish me luck - I don’t believe that anyone has ever actually died from missing their toddler, but you never know.

Can’t.Talk.Too.Full

Just home from Jake’s grandfather’s 85th birthday dinner. Oh my lord, that was some good food and fun. I had a yummy crab cake that I could not even finish. Plus a martini and some homemade Irish creme. I’m thirsty now but am not sure that I can even hold any water.

Tomorrow begins the mad preparation for our trip. I can’t believe it’s almost here.

Curiouser and Curiouser

Ah, the continuing saga of Trashy Neighbor.

I might have mentioned that a couple of weeks ago, it seemed apparent that his third live-in since we’ve been here arrived with her crap and her hooligan kids and looked like they were ready to stay for the long haul. I can’t remember if I blogged that or Twittered it and I’m too lazy to go check. The two of you who actually read this blog should be following me on Twitter anyway, so you’ll be kept abreast of all the news.

Anyway, earlier this week, I noticed a police car in front of Trashy Neighbor’s house. No lights going, just the officer in the car with the interior light on, obviously doing some sort of paperwork. I had apparently missed the drama that had gone on, for which I am thankful.  And I thought that was mighty fast for the first domestic dispute, although with his history of violence against women, it was always a matter of when and not if.

But now, I haven’t seen her car or her hooligans since then. I wonder if she just wised up faster than the rest of them and high tailed it out of there.

I promise I don’t want to all up in his business but it literally gets laid on my front door step all the time, so I can’t help but wonder about it.

OK, off to do housework now. I have company coming and I’m not ready.

More Things That Piss Me Off

Granted I’m stressed but this is just annoying.

Why is that stores that are FOR CHILDREN are always the ones that make it hardest to go to WITH CHILDREN?

As an example, I have discovered an Osh Kosh store near us. And the stuff they sell is very different from the Osh Kosh line that Target carries, in that it actually fits Bridget. The Target stuff does not, and no matter how many times I get tricked into buying the Target stuff, I always regret it because it never fits her right. But I digress. The Osh Kosh store is a terribly fun place to go, and it’s cheap cheap cheap. Except that the racks of clothes are packed together so closely that there is absolutely no way to navigate through them if you are pushing a stroller. Which, and I know this sounds crazy, people with children often do.

Today we went to Babies R Us (a store I abhor by the way, and hope that this might be the last time I ever have to step foot inside one) because Bridget has thrown the receiver to her monitor one too many times and now it doesn’t work right. If you want to hear anything, you have to turn it up almost to maximum volume because the lower volumes only transmit static now. It was a good monitor - it was the Evenflo Whisper Connect, by the way, if you are in the market for a decent monitor that’s not too pricey - but it has lived its last days. And since Jake’s mom is coming, I really didn’t want to have to spend twenty minutes explaining how to wheedle the persnickety monitor into working and I surely didn’t want her to be jolted from sleep by it crapping out and alternating beeps and static, like it does to me fairly often. Damn, I can’t keep on topic today. Too much caffeine I suppose. Anyhow, I had already checked out Target’s selection and didn’t like any there, and I could have gone back to Amazon where I got this one but I didn’t have time to wait for shipping. That is the very long story of how I ended up at BRU today.

After selecting my new monitor from the three they carry that are not video monitors, I tried to look at the clothes because Bridget is outgrowing a lot of her pajamas, and I figured that since I was there, it might save me a trip to Old Navy, which carries great kids pajamas, but is another place I hate to go with a stroller. And damn if those racks were also not so packed together that I could not get the cart through without knocking off clothes from racks left and right. And you can’t leave the toddler in the cart out in the main aisle while you go in to look at anything because if she doesn’t fling herself out of the cart the minute my back is turned, then you run the risk of having some whacko grab her and run. Although I think with the mood she was in today, they probably would have turned around and brought her back before making it out of the store.

Other stores for kids that are horrible to get around in if you are actually dumb enough to bring your kid are Carter’s, Gymboree, The Children’s Place and some Baby Gap stores. Honestly you would think they’d think these things through whilst in the planning stages, wouldn’t you?

Disgruntled Postal Customer

I’ve been stewing about this for a while. But now I decided that you wonderful people out there get to hear my rant. Maybe I’ll feel better.

Yesterday when I got home from running a zillion errands, I checked the mail, which had not yet arrived. So I went about my business, tidying up a bit, putting Bridget down for a nap, and working.

When I checked the mail again at around 4, I had a slip on my door saying that they had tried to deliver an Express Mail package and that no one was home. Except I was home! No one knocked, no one rang. I was here and awake and had anyone knocked or rang the bell, the dog would have barked. I know that our doorbell works and the dogs vocal chords have not stopped working.

So now, I get the distinct pleasure of going to the main post office here in Garland, which I despise doing, I hate it with the burning heat of a thousand suns, because they for some reason didn’t feel like walking the damn package to the door? I honestly don’t get it. They had to walk to the door to put the notice on the door. So why not just ring the bell and deliver the package?

This, folks, is why people hate the post office. Well, this and their gross inefficiency, crazy bureaucracy and hateful counter employees. I almost killed an asshole postal worker once when trying to send my income tax return via certified mail. Granted, I was in the throes of a clomid induced Black Rage, but he really was one of the most hateful customer service people I have ever encountered. Except I’m sure I’ll find the asshole-iest one tomorrow when I go.

Hurricane Bridget

Today I went to get Bridget up from her nap, and saw this.

This is almost every single item she owns in her bed. That’s stuffed animals, books, clothes (clean and dirty) and shoes all in her bed.  I knew it was too quiet in there.

I think I want to put a video monitor in her room because I am dying to know what the hell she does up there. Like, I know she gets up after I put her to bed. Tonight for example, she wanted one more book but we had been down that path before and I said no. As I was laying her down, she was actually smirking at me, I shit you not. So I know she was up after I left the room. But does she head back to bed before she falls asleep? Or does she collapse on the floor in a heap and then wake up later? Is that why she usually wakes up crying around 10 or so? Maybe the floor gets uncomfortable and she wakes up to head to bed then. Without a video monitor, we’ll never know.

I’m still not wild about this big girl bed situation, but I have no choice but to accept it. But look how cute and excited she is about her bed! How can I resist this?

Tired and Stressed

I am so tired that my bones hurt. I’ve gone far too many nights in a row with far too little sleep. And this is going to be one long week as I get ready for Jake’s mom to be here and for us to be gone for a week. I have things to organize and clean out and appointments and phone calls to make and keep and packing to do…. The good thing is that this will keep me from thinking too much about this whole thing.

Don’t get me wrong, I am so excited to go to Mexico with Jake. I certainly don’t want to go with Bridget. And yet, the thought of leaving her for four days while we are out of the country really bothers me. I know I keep bitching about this and I certainly don’t mean to sound ungrateful for the chance we have to go and for the gracious offer from Jake’s mom to play toddler wrangler for five full days. I really want to get away and relax. And I’m going to try to turn off the mom in me as much as possible. I’m hoping that it is as others say it is - that once I get a certain distance away, I’ll be able to turn it off and start to remember what my life was like before Bridget came along.

But before all that can happen, I have to get a pedicure, get a bikini wax, pack, organize cabinets and the pantry, go to the eye doctor, do a ton of laundry, pick up our wills, pay bills, air out the guest room and make some room in there, figure out weekend plans with the family…. OK, I just need to go to bed now and not think about these things anymore.

Bottom of the Barrel

I’m skipping show and tell this week because my brain is scattered all over the place with a zillion things I need to plan and do and think about before we leave for Mexico one week from tomorrow. Holy crap.

But one thing I have been meaning to share this little tidbit.

I spend a fair amount of time at the gym on a treadmill. And since I can never remember my iPod I’m at the mercy of the gym video network and six other tvs that have various shows on with the closed captioning going. I guess if I had some sort of snazzy radio I could tune to the appropriate station and hear what Regis and Kelly or Martha Stewart are actually saying, but I don’t. For some reason, I just follow along with the captioning.

And I have to tell you that if I were hearing impared and relied on the closed captioning for my news and entertainment, I would be pissed off. I think they have drunk monkeys doing the transcribing. And this isn’t just one network - I see it on NBC, ABC and CNN. I have no idea how it actually works behind the scenes, if each network does their own captioning or if each network uses the same service. No clue. But half of what I read on the screen makes no sense thanks to typos and just flat out craziness. Some of the things I see up there aren’t even real words. Sometimes I find myself giggling at the nonsense and then sometimes I find myself getting really angry that someone is getting paid to do this job, to make the lives of hearing impaired people easier, and they obviously aren’t taking it seriously. I can understand a typo here and there, but this is over the top.

Maybe I better make it a point to bring the iPod to the gym. I obviously need something else to think about before I start a riot amongst the deaf community.

Belated

Yeah, I missed my post from yesterday. I suck. Well, in my defense, I did not stop moving from the time I got up at 7:30 to the time I went to bed at 1 a.m. Gym, helping to clean the garage, grocery shopping, showering and going out to dinner with the family for July birthdays kept me very busy. Then we took horrible advantage of Jake’s sister who was babysitting for us and went to see The Dark Knight. It was good, but I had a headache - don’t mix sake and martinis by the way. And I was tired. I’m probably downplaying how good the movie was. Heath Ledger was incredible. Just incredible. If I had more free time on my hands I might have to go see it again. But the next thing I see will be Mama Mia.

OK, off to run more errands. Getting ready to be gone for four days and leaving the house and our kid in the care of someone else takes a lot of planning.

Cupcakes Like Crack

Ever since Sprinkles Beverly Hills came to Dallas, we’ve had it a few times. In my opinion, it’s ok. I don’t think it’s the end all be all of existence but if we happen to be around there, and there is time, there is no reason not to stop in. Some of the varieties that I’ve tried, I’ve flat out disliked. In general, I tend not to like most frosting, but I really don’t like most of their frosting. My normal favorite is cinnamon sugar, which has no frosting at all.

But today, after our trip to the lawyer to get our wills signed and notarized, we felt that lunch was warranted and since we were there, a stop at Sprinkles was in order. And they had a new flavor which I just HAD to try. Chocolate Marshmallow. It’s a chocolate cupcake with marshmallow cream in the center, and frosted with chocolate ganache. This might be one of the best things I’ve ever eaten. It’s like a Ding Dong only much much much better. The chocolate in it is dark chocolate which I don’t even like, and I like this cupcake. I’ll be back down there next Saturday for a pre-beach wax and I think I’ll be buying about sixty of those suckers. Forgive me Trainer Dave, for I have sinned.

On an unrelated note, Bridget fell out of her toddler bed twice last night. The first time, we heard “Thump…. WAAAAH!” (deja vu all over again) and went up to find her sitting on the floor bawling her little eyes out. She was not hurt, just scared. It took me a while to get her calmed enough to go back to sleep but she did. Then about 1 a.m. I heard the THUMP again. But no crying. When I went in to her, she was standing up with the most pissed off look on her face. It was not pretty after that, she cried for at least half an hour. I tried to explain to her that if she kept her head on the pillow, she would not fall out of bed. Must have worked because she has not fallen out since. Who knew she was so practical?